I keep wondering from time to time how much more weird common English usage is going to get. In connection with politically correct gender-sensitivity, they started saying chairwoman instead of chairman when women became increasingly more visible in high places. Then they decided it would be more convenient (or egalitarian) to write ‘-person’ instead of ‘man’ and ‘woman’, so we stopped hearing of chairmen and chairwomen, and grew familiar with just plain chairpersons.
Then somebody somewhere may have started wondering what to do about postman and milkman, and even hu-man… would it be okay to write that we are all huperson beings? By and by someone came up with the really brilliant idea to drop the suffix altogether. So these days we hear that Dr. So and so is the Chair of the department of economics or physics in such and such university. Fancy that it should be considered a great step forward to reduce a person to a thing! The chair sits on a chair, I suppose, but which is which? I’m sure a Martian newly introduced to the charms of the English language would tie him- (it?) self up into knots puzzling over it.
And yet we still hear that Congresswoman Ms. X has just given a fiery speech. How long before she is referred to as just plain Congress?
Then somebody somewhere may have started wondering what to do about postman and milkman, and even hu-man… would it be okay to write that we are all huperson beings? By and by someone came up with the really brilliant idea to drop the suffix altogether. So these days we hear that Dr. So and so is the Chair of the department of economics or physics in such and such university. Fancy that it should be considered a great step forward to reduce a person to a thing! The chair sits on a chair, I suppose, but which is which? I’m sure a Martian newly introduced to the charms of the English language would tie him- (it?) self up into knots puzzling over it.
And yet we still hear that Congresswoman Ms. X has just given a fiery speech. How long before she is referred to as just plain Congress?
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7 comments:
Absolutely hilarious, Suvro. Extending your thougths a little further, we should soon see hupersonitarian aid pouring in after a natural calamity!
And how about gender-neutral pronouns, as in "Who has left behind their red umbrella?"
Although I sometimes use this pronoun, I am not entirely comfortable with it. It is good that people are still resisting it and it hasn't been accepted without demur.
Suvro da, this whole "gender bender" deal has me in splits sometimes unless I'm groaning, and sometimes I'm left wondering whether some of the stuff is serious or maybe (hopefully?) just spoofs. There were a series of strange words forwarded by some feminists - such as herstory, she-ro, wofem, womage, womon/womyn/wimmin/wofem...and even sefem (!), and some have also added ovarium to the long list (which apparently is used in place of seminar) - and in all seriousness, and there are more than God-knows how many more bizarre words doing their rounds.... I'll most likely be accused of being politically incorrect for saying that these words are bizarre or maybe I'll be "tsked" at for being an "innocent victim" of "patriarchal hegemonic discourse".
The best I can do is to snort loudly and say that I don't know what's politically correct any longer and couldn't care less - although some of the politically correct stuff is just simply silly at best and vile and evil at worst.
"The chair sits on a chair...which is which..." Funny-funny!
Thanks for the post, Suvro da.
Shilpi
Sir,
This has been the most interesting and humorous blog that I have ever read here.
I think that people are simply becoming ridiculous about the usage of English language.
The concept of a "CHAIR" sitting on a chair is a fine example to show the level of English usage among the "Educated" society(where they are confused just to differentiate between the genders).
The most astonishing part is that people are accepting those meaningless words and using them just to show off how "Modern" they are.
I can sense that a bitter attack has been made by you on the present society for the misuse of English Language.
Nevertheless,I suppose that if this situation continues for long,then the concept of "Proper Noun" will become obsolete and "Abstract Nouns" will be used to point out any and every worldly things(including animals).
A question has come to my mind presently regarding the title of the blog.....
Will the proper title of the blog be "Gender Blender"?or the "Gender Bender"is the proper one?
With Regards,
Soumallya Chattopadhyay.
'Bender' is appropriate in the context: be so kind as to look up the word in the dictionary.
But, come to think of it, 'blender' wouldn't have been entirely out of place, either!
Sir,
I had looked up the word in the dictionary and then only I had asked you the question.In the dictionary,the meaning of "Bender"is written as:A period of drinking a lot of alcohol or taking a lot of drugs".It is also notified that the word is used as a slang.
Since I could not link the meaning of the word with the blog title,I had asked you the question.There may be some alternative meaning of the word.And evidently,I do not know the other meaning.Would you please tell me the other meaning which rightly fits for the title of the blog?I shall be thankful to you for your reply.
Thanking you,
Yours faithfully,
Soumallya Chattopadhyay
And picking up the threads further, we would have to be ready with all the unkind vestiges of this ‘personkind’, (have you ever wondered, what to do about this basic etymological gender slip ? there is a bit of man in every woman?) and correct them, as far as possible, with such words as ‘personpower’ and ‘personning’ scales when we talk about trimming the flab of an organization or the like;
and taking account of the gender-neutral gastronomic habits of the ‘fearful symmetries’ stalking the Sunderbans, we should be terming them as ‘person-eaters’!
But no, we would not like the gender correction in the word ‘manhandle’ to engender the word ‘personhandle’ because, most women would agree, it is mostly the innate power of ‘manhood’ that make men mishandle situations at times! But again, not to be grossly unfair to the menfolk either, shouldn’t we also think of evolving such words as ‘personipulative’?
And wait with bated breath when the milkman, boatman, candyman superman and the showman (no, not Romans, they are different, we know!!) would suffer regressions in terms of their corresponding neuter kinds, (yes,as Suvro made us see), to milk, boat, candy…… or, err,.. perhaps are they less exalted to be reduced thus?
And, no wonder, remember, when Hemanta sang “Tumi dekho nari purush, aami dekhi sudhui manush” in “Phuleswari”!! and thank heavens! till then we were taking, in the archetypal mind frame that is, men and women as the exclusive and exhaustive variants of the gender divide and have not entered into the uncharted, ‘beyond gender’, domain of the modern times where such exclusive typifications would again be considered incorrect, immoral and silly!
This is in response to Shilpi's comments on this post.
Thank you, Shilpi, for educating me about these new additions to the English lexicon.
Just as every village has its resident idiot, the academic community too has its lunatic fringes. I think we can ignore them with the contempt they deserve, without bothering for political correctness.
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